Porn Saved My Marriage
Yesterday, we heard from Amarillo da Vaca for the first time in over five years. Much to our surprise, he was still alive after he was thought to have committed suicide. Today, he sent the following email:
The previous article does not reflect the opinion of Tony Vahl or Damian Hospital. We respect free speech, and are happy that Amarillo finds the will to live by expressing his opinions.
Let's go Mets.
To: numbersix***
From: Amarillo
Subject: Article for REAL DailySkew
I was inspired by Arturo Sundvold's recent article to make a confession -- porn keeps me sane and stress-free.
If it wasn't for porn, I'd probably be spending my check-cashing loan at a strip club. If it wasn't for porn, I'd be hitting on the hot neighbor two buildings down. If it wasn't for porn, I'd be at the bars, looking to pick up chicks.
If it wasn't for porn, I'd be on CL, buying some discounted a$$.
Thank god for porn sites and P2P.
Today, I'm not even attracted to real women. Unless it's on my computer screen, I don't get turned on.
Porn keeps me thinking with my brain while I'm out in the real world, and not with my head.
There's nothing better than porn to keep the modern conservative man sane. The actresses who perform in those movies are a godsend to a christian male like myself -- they keep me free from the sin of adultery and lust.
See you in the pornos, Arturo!
The previous article does not reflect the opinion of Tony Vahl or Damian Hospital. We respect free speech, and are happy that Amarillo finds the will to live by expressing his opinions.
Let's go Mets.
Labels: adultery, CL, conservative, lust, porn, sane, stress-free
posted by Skew | Tuesday, January 08, 2008
25 Comments:
whaddya like?
He's in love with a computer monitor.
Sad, pathetic, weak, feeble, lame, sorry, depressing, and ignorant...yet understandable.
I'm gonna hit your wrists with a ruler.
Somebody call his parents. Right now.
Hey true believer, what if I told you that there are 250 FREE MARVEL COMICS ONLINE FOR YOU TO READ- RIGHT NOW!
Check out Marvel DCU!
http://www.marvel.com/digitalcomics/hq
Maybe he can help Andy Pettitte prepare for his legal defense.
LOSER!
I know what *I* like
Me, too
Me, five.
I support gay rights! ESPECIALLY lesbians' rights to act!
Are all of your lights off?
Mais uma versão engraçada da musica (É Este O Modo Para) Amarillo ... Show da Vaca Louca Uma animação muito engraçado da Vaca-Louca
español Francisco Coronado foi o primeiro europeo en chegar á rexión da actual Amarillo, pero non foi ata 1887 en que se funda a actual Amarillo. En 1918 descúbrese petróleo, comezando a prosperidade da cidade, coa instalación na cidade de compañías de petróleo e gas
BLUE DOLPHIN ENTRANCE
I hope you get CAUGHT by some guy
AND he used G-d's name in vain.
Stick a fork in him.
He should record himself and post it, so the world can see how much of a loser he is.
Hey true believer, what if I told you that there are 250 FREE MARVEL COMICS ONLINE FOR YOU TO READ- RIGHT NOW!
Check out Marvel DCU!
http://www.marvel.com/digitalcomics/hq
Yellow of Cow, not black gold from ground.
Cow piss.
ESTA ENTRANDO PER LA ENTRADA BLUE DOLFIN
Sorry, sir, the Simon Mall wave wiped out BLUE DOLFIN. One day, you too, will forget.
Buddhists are to avoid intoxicants and "mind poisons." The contemporary Vietnamese Zen teacher, Thich Nhat Hanh, has suggested that porn can be like an intoxicant, something that has an unhelpful effect on the mind, as can violent television programs.
Tantric Buddhism has historically had a very deep appreciation for the marked potential for using sexual energies for spiritual growth.
EDIT: Five basic precepts all Buddhists are encouraged to follow are:
1. Do not kill
2. Do not steal
3. Do not indulge in sexual misconduct
4. Do not make false speech
5. Do not take intoxicants
I see Thich Nhat Hanh's wording of the 3d and 5th precepts online; they read:
Aware of the suffering caused by sexual misconduct, I vow to cultivate responsibility and learn ways to protect the safety and integrity of individuals, couples, families and society. I am determined not to engage in sexual relations without love and a long-term commitment. To preserve the happiness of myself and others, I am determined to respect my commitments and the commitments of others. I will do everything in my power to protect children from sexual abuse and to prevent couples and families from being broken by sexual misconduct.
Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful consumption, I vow to cultivate good health, both physical and mental, for myself, my family, and my society by practicing mindful eating, drinking and consuming. I vow to ingest only items that preserve peace, well-being and joy in my body, in my consciousness, and in the collective body and consciousness of my family and society. I am determined not to use alcohol or any other intoxicant or to ingest foods or other items that contain toxins, such as certain TV programs, magazines, books, films and conversations. I am aware that to damage my body or my consciousness with these poisons is to betray my ancestors, my parents, my society and future generations. I will work to transform violence, fear, anger and confusion in myself and in society by practicing a diet for myself and for society. I understand that a proper diet is crucial for self-transformation and for the transformation of society.
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