Snowglobe Pseudo-paradox and More Skew
So, a pirate can steal an oil tanker, but I can't bring a snowglobe on a plane?
The law-abiding are bound by laws, and the law-breakers are free to break them?
The honest are mocked when they admit a mistake, while the criminal pirate of Aden or Wall Street are rewarded?
"Give a moment or two to the Angry Young Man…."
– Billy Joel
I think it's time for a Snowglobe Manifesto.
I'd rather have my memories encased in plastic and made in China than built on Madoff's house of lies. Keep your Ponzi schemes and give me cheap goods, because Made in the USA doesn't exist anymore.
I'll help my brothers in Brazil get a bowl of rice and beans before I feed another bailout-supported corporate champagne-sipper.
Buy it:
Made in Japan
Made in Brazil
Made in China
Made in India
Made in Korea
Don't buy from what doesn't exist. Let Madoff's hot air drift away in the breeze.
***
Don't pack your snowglobe in your check-in luggage. Hand your plastic liquid memories to the TSA agent. Make him feel guilty, as I did mine.
He was Asian descent – he knew. He knew.
***
Made in Chile. Embrace it. Love it. You have no choice – "Choice is an illusion." You be too poor to make a choice. Buy that third hand Japanese video game or Mexican Fender Strat, if it assuages your patriotic guilt.
Patriotism? Bush killed patriotism in South Florida. I need a job to afford his brand of patriotism!
***
Don't let the Dilbert drones bring you down. The useful idiots help the three security guards control the 100's in the prison. Ignore them – they cannot be counciled, reasoned with … They are useful only to the corporate spreadsheet. Let them remain there, imprisoned in Excel, a number and never a man.
***
Snowglobes make me feel peaceful and young inside. Bush took away my peace and youth. I hope it looks good on his Halliburton mantle.
***
"I believe I've passed the age of consciousness and righteous rage. I found that just surviving was a noble fight…."
–Billy Joel
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It’s in the game.
Reading Skew is boner-inducing.
PREACH IT, BROTHER.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHA
BUSH TOOK AWAY HIS CHILDHOOD~~~
Cheney took away my anal virginity.
“Patriotism? Bush killed patriotism in South Florida. I need a job to afford his brand of patriotism!”
but also:
“Buy it:
Made in Japan
Made in Brazil
Made in China
Made in India
Made in Korea”
there is an obvious connection between these two things and you cant be on both sides of this –
Thanks Nafta and other free trade agreements!
but perhaps Im taking this post too seriously.
in closing –
if they outlaw snowglobes:
then only outlaws will have snowglobes.
The snowglobe is now a symbol of freedom in this opressed land.
A symbol of the coming snowglobe-revolution.
First there was the communist manifesto, then came the communist revoution.
Now brave Tony (codename Vahl) has given the qworld the Snowglobe-Manifesto, and so the Snowglobe-Revolution is sure to follow.
Maybe its just that whole bottle of robotussin I just drank kicking in, but Im feeling a new spirit rising up throughout the land of oppression, as I feel the ideological spirit of huddled masses cry out with one voice…
VIVA LA REVOLUCIóN DE SNOWGLOBO!!!
So let it be written, so let it be done.