I felt really bad for Rick Perry last night. When he forgot the third Federal Agency he wants to eliminate during the CNBC Debate, I cringed. It’s easy to forget something, and to do that during a Presidential Debate? Man, that sucks. He’s human.
What’s worse? For a few seconds, no one threw him a life-line. Not that I blame the other candidates for the Republican Primary. He had just spent the previous minute ripping every other candidate, saying he was the only one who had a legitimate Fair Tax solution.
So, they let him flail in the water. They knew, from previous debates, that Perry could not swim. Ron Paul started saying, “Five, five,” which was OBVIOUSLY a reference to his Enneagram Type ;p.
At the very end, the only person to offer a lifeline to Rick Perry was?
Herman Cain. He said, “EPA?”
Herman Cain proved he had a heart. He proved he was capable of empathy. If his wife will come out and stand by her man publicly, he will have my vote (if he wins the Primary; I’m not a registered Republican).
Anyway, check out my Podcast on last night’s CNBC debate, where I play the Rick Perry Oops clip.
Anyway, here is the original text from Rick Perry’s campaign, where they try to turn last night’s gaffe into a fundraising pitch, followed by a DailySkew Translation:
Original Text:
We’ve all had human moments. President Obama is still trying to find all 57 states. Ronald Reagan got lost somewhere on the Pacific Highway n an answer to a debate question. Gerald Ford ate a tamale without removing the husk. And tonight Rick Perry forgot the third agency he wants to eliminate. Just goes to show there are too damn many federal agencies.
The governor said it best afterwards: “I’m glad I had my boots on, because I sure stepped in it tonight.”
While the media froths over this all too human moment, we thought we would take this opportunity to ask your help in doing something much more constructive: write us to let us know what federal agency you would most like to forget.
Is it the EPA and it’s job-killing zealots? The NLRB and its czar-like dictates? The edu-crats at the Department of Education who aim to control your local curriculum?
Send your answer to forgetmenot@rickperry.org, and if you are on twitter join us in using a new twitter hastag: #forgetmenot. And, if you could, throw in a $5 contribution for every agency you would like to forget. We hope you have a long list. And we promise we will write down every last idea. So we don’t forget.
Translation:
Hey, everybody has goofed like Rick Perry before. You know you relate. Heck, President Obama goofed big time once, and the MEDIA covered it up. Ronald Reagan goofed one time, although that was so long ago you probably never heard about it. And Gerald Ford? Well, he was a walking gaffe machine. Tonight, our man Rick Perry forgot some darn Federal Agency. Who can blame him? He’s only running for President! That’s a lot of pressure. It’s easy to forget something when getting grilled by John Harwood.
Rick Perry meant to say afterwards: “This was really embarrassing. I’d like to stick my boot up John Harwood’s you-know-what. Oh, and thanks to all the other candidates for letting me hang out there like that.”
The New York Times and MSNBC are going to have a FIELD DAY with this. So, in a last ditch effort to turn this nightmare into a positive, we are asking you to forget about what happened last night, and tell us which Federal Agencies should be eliminated.
Do you think Cain is right, and we should put the EPA to the list? How about the NLRB; we know what that stands for, do you? Of course, we’re really excited about eliminating the Department of Education. Federal Education really annoys Rick Perry.
Anyway, you can email or tweet us. If Rick Perry is smart enough for social, he is smart enough to be President. And please send some contributions our way. We hope you have a lot of money for us. We promise to count every dollar and remember every donor. Especially the big contributors.
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