Speed Racer Crashed, Thank God

Here are my reasons why I smiled when I heard the news that Speed Racer bombed:

1. I won't have to see those INSANE acid-trip-inducing colors and video-game cheese graphics flashed on my television screen ad infinitum on commercials, promos, awards shows, etc. Once it's out on DVD, the next time I expect to see this movie is in a Wal-Mart $5.00 bin.
2. Let me just stress the fact that I AM SO THRILLED that I won't have to hear about how great SPEED RACER the MOVIE was for the rest of the decade.
3. I am not a Speed Racer fan. Believe me, I tried -- I remember I bought issue one of some manga Speed Racer back in the 80's, to try to get into the myth ... and I'm sorry, but Robotech it was not. Unlike anime I enjoy, this story was thin. There didn't seem to be any substance to it.
4. Racer-X is Speed Racer's long-dead brother -- wow. What a mystery. I'm sure Sherlock Holmes could have solved that in ... what? A split-second? In his sleep? Would he have turned to his cocaine and asked Dr. Watson to solve it, so boring was the mystery?
5. Sorry, but cool-looking vehicles just don't cut it. If I want to watch cool cars and crazy stunts, I'll watch Tokyo Drift.
   
6. Who thought that throwing computer graphics on the bring screen would sell to audiences? Does that even make any sense? IF you want to make a CG cartoon ... don't be shy. Just make one! That would have sold better -- at least then you'd be catering to the Dreamworks/Sony Pictures crowd.